Take a moment and think about where you are. Not the street you are on. Think about where you are in life.

How does where you are match with where you wanted to be? I think about this often. It is especially important to me as the year winds down.

What were my plans last January? Am I where I planned to be? Did I achieve what I intended? If not, why not?

You have to give up what you are to be all you can be. That’s just common sense. Most people you value made many changes in their lives. The important changes were internal. They changed attitudes. They changed how life affected them. They determined the person they wanted to be and became that person.

Everyone has the ability to change. The question is, “What about me do I have to change?”

I received an email discussing changes we must make for success. Most of the time is not change so much as what we have to give up.

  1. Drop your voice of judgment. This internal VOJ directs us in ways not in our best interest. Our VOJ comes from our past. It is the voice of who we once were. Give up who you were. Be the person you are today. Work to be the person you want to be.
  2. Know the difference between what’s of interest and what you can influence. Stop worrying about what’s beyond your ability to do anything about. I know many people distressed about the coming presidential election. They worry about one candidate or the other winning and what it means. Stop worrying about things like this. The candidates don’t worry about you.
  3. Look around every day and focus on what’s good in your life. We’re approaching Thanksgiving Day. This about what you can be thankful for. No one’s life is 100% negative – unless they see it that way. I know a fellow who worked as a school janitor, continuing his education at night. He became principle of the school where he once mopped halls and emptied trash cans. J.K. Rowling was homeless when she started writing the Harry Potter books. She’s now one if the richest people in England.
  4. Don’t let other people remote control your life. They control you by how you think they judge you. The way a stranger looks at us may bring us down.I met a woman who told about attending her son’s youth basketball game. Throughout the game she sensed a woman staring at her. It made her uncomfortable. She wondered what was wrong with her appearance or actions to cause this woman to stare at her. After the game the staring woman approached asking, “I admire your hair style. Would you tell me which shop you go to?”

Sometimes giving up is not quitting. Give up your weaknesses and concentrate on your strengths. Do a self audit. Take a few minutes a day, just a few. Jot down what you want to change. Plan how you’re going to change.

Now, here’s the challenge: Ask five people who know you well. People you trust most. Ask them to describe you in three words. Have them use just three descriptive words. Then match those descriptions with how you view yourself.

Please don’t be distraught by the responses. This is a method for becoming the person you want to be. If your friends are true, they will be honest. Work to end your flaws and embellish your strengths.

Change is good.

If it is change you created working from a plan to get where you want to be.

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